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I took my kids to a birthday party this weekend, and it seemed like every two minutes someone started bawling and everyone stopped what they were doing and soothed the little crybaby. And it wasn’t just the moms coddling daughters.

On two separate occasions dads came in, acted like their little wuss of a son had just survived some traumatic event and showered attention on them. One dad even kissed his kid, picked him up and rocked him like a baby even though the goddamned child was four years old.

What the heck happened to us? I will sometimes tolerate little girls crying, but boys? When I was a kid, boys were usually (and correctly) mocked for crying. I clearly remember being called a pussy at one of my own birthday parties for whining, and that was by my own mom. I’m also fairly certain the question of “What are you, a little fag?” was asked at the same party when one of my cousins cried after being stung by a bee.

People have gotten too in touch with the feminine sides, and it’s time we reversed that trend. And, if you want to make long-term changes to society, you have to start with the children. Stop treating them like they’re little princes and princesses. If they fall asleep at a party, do what I did and draw a little dick on their face. I don’t make the party rules, but I will damn well enforce them.

We also need to bring back public spanking. A quick but firm smack isn’t going to bruise anything but their over-inflated little egos. It’s time people learned they aren’t special, and the world doesn’t revolved around them. And, if we want that message to stick, we need to start early.