The fact that he’s one of the leaders of the free world almost makes me wonder if we shouldn’t just forego elections and pick names randomly out of a hat.
In a recent op-ed he penned for the New York Times, it seems that McCain is still frustrated that he wasn’t able to start World War III with an attack against Syria and Iran, and he has now turned his befuddled gaze to the great nation of Ukraine.
McCain recommended increasing NATO’s military presence on Russia’s eastern borders, which makes a lot of sense. If you’re trying to start a thermonuclear war that ends human life as we know it.
I guess McCain forgot what happened in the 1960s when Russia tried installing missiles in Cuba. We came closer to nuclear annihilation than at any time in history, and that’s when we backed off and respected the buffer zone between our rival Empires.
Russia is never going to be our friend, and much like with an ex-wife, a policy of studied avoidance is recommended. Otherwise, keep the meetings short and sweet.
And don’t ever, ever decide to have sex once for old time’s sake. You’ll just end up getting the clap and suspecting she took that large emerald ring that was left to you in your grandma’s will.