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According to the Malay Mail, vice officers in the Sunway Mentari suburb of Kuala Lumpur Malaysia were confused why they kept finding car wash loyalty program cards in the pockets of men busted for using prostitutes. It seemed to be happening too frequently to be a coincidence, but at first, cops could find no clear connection.

After an extended investigation, it all became clear.

It seems the carwash owner was some kind of marketing visionary, and he paired up with the prostitutes at a local massage parlor. Men who joined his customer loyalty program and paid for ten car washes were then able to get a hooker for free.

I don’t throw the word genius around lightly, but how is it that no one ever thought of this before? I never sign up for these stupid programs, but if a company like McDonald’s suddenly said that I could get a free happy ending after I bought 10 happy meals, you better believe I’d be eating fast food every night.

The more I think about it, the opportunities here are endless. Even the slogans like “Get More Bang For Your Buck” practically write themselves. I demand the government legalize prostitution right now so companies can cash in on this potential marketing bonanza.

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