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michael_moore_yell Shortly after the Boston terror attack, clueless leftist reporters and politicians swung into action and immediately tried to pin the bombing on their political opponents. Government-funded NPR even speculated those terrible tea partiers might have chosen the month of April to detonate a bomb because Hitler was born in that month.

Great reporting, guys. You know who else was born in April? That bloated lump of shit Michael Moore. Maybe he funded the attack. After all, you know that guy hates exercise.

Salon magazine, which is aptly named considering most of its articles come across like bitter queens bantering with each other while getting their hair done, even wrote a little piece hoping the bomber would be a white American.

Better luck next time, fellas. If it’s any consolation, the bombers are white-ish. You can work with that, right?

Actually, probably not. These scumbags are Muslims from Chechnya. This landlocked little shithole has been carrying out terrorist attacks against Russia for years, and these same Chechens have flocked to Syria in droves to wage Jihad against the Assad regime.

And since we want to punish Syria for supporting Iran, we call these murderers freedom fighters as they kill innocent women and children as part of their holy war against the secular Syrian government. And now we’re getting a taste of it.

Who knew you couldn’t trust people with a militant ideology who are committed to your destruction? Not the professional left. That’s for sure.