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jim When you think of West Virginia, words like inbred and moron spring to mind, and this story will do absolutely nothing to change that.

Police in Fayette County West Virginia confirmed that a man was electrocuted Wednesday after he shot down a power line and tried to steal the copper from it.

Apparently, he thought power lines were like electric cords, and once you detached one end, it was safe to handle.

Unfortunately, common sense and basic physics begged to differ.

Police didn’t release the man’s name, but according to the half-assed Internet search I just conducted, he was Dalton Newhouse, aged 22. His accomplice, Charles Raymond Norris, somehow managed to avoid the lure of the magical sparkly wire, and he’s now being charged with attempt to commit a felony, conspiracy to commit a felony and disruption of a public utility.

Last time I checked, scrap copper was going for a little more than $3 a pound, so this isn’t exactly a get rich quick scheme. Plus, people tend to notice when their goddamned power goes out, so even if you do shoot down a line, you’re going to have company before you know it.

On the plus side, this does clear up one thing. For years I’ve wondered what people in West Virginia do for work if they’re too dumb to cook meth, and it appears I have my answer.

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