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The chief bomb maker of Yemen’s Al Qaeda branch, Ibrahim al-Asiri, was responsible for the underwear bomb Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab tried to use to destroy a plane in 2009. The bomb failed and Umar only succeeded in setting his pants on fire, but al-Asiri was not deterred.

Realizing that he should probably stop stealing ideas from Wile E. Coyote, he moved up to ripping off the 2008 movie The Dark Knight. In that movie the Joker stuffs a fat guy with explosives and used the resulting explosion to destroy a police precinct.

Ibrahim al-Asiri thought that was a sweet idea, and he tried it out by, and I’m not making this up, sticking an explosive device up his own brother’s ass in 2009 so he could assassinate the Saudi Arabian intelligence chief, Prince Muhammad bin Nayef.

Since karma obviously has a sense of humor, the ass-bomb exploded prematurely killing the would-be assassin.

U.S. officials have now warned that al-Asiri may have developed a bomb with no metal parts that cannot be detected by airport metal detectors. These bombs would be surgically implanted in the abdominal cavity of someone who would then detonate the explosive onboard a flight.

I understand officials have to take all threats seriously, but I have a hard time believing this kid is going to pull this off. He looks like a cast-off from an Arab boy band, and he can’t even grow a goddamned proper goatee. After looking at his picture, I also have a hunch about why he seems to be fixated with causing explosions in men’s rectums and underwear.

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