I don’t typically listen to shitty music, and the one time I heard a Justin Bieber song it reminded me of nothing so much as this excruciating version of Bye Bye Birdie by Ann Margret.
Still, 12-year-old girls and pedophiles seem to love the kid, and he is in the news all the time. And maybe I’m not being fair here but it seems like every time I see a picture of him, he appears to be mildly retarded.
Here’s a picture of him meeting with the prime minister of Canada, and he’s wearing the same overalls as the bear my daughter got from Build-A-Bear Workshop®. Did he get the same bear, and if so, did he want to wear the same little outfit?
I understand Canada is a joke of a country, and if it wasn’t for American military support Eskimo warlords would lay waste to their towns and villages, but you normally dress up a bit for this type of occasion. That is unless you’re special.
And here’s another picture of him in London. His handlers said it was because of a dare, but I say bullshit. He probably threw a little tantrum because he wanted to dress himself, and this is what he chose. And to teach him a lesson, they let him.
Look, I’m not a doctor, and maybe I’m completely off-base here, but I’m guessing he’s at least slightly retarded.