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The interlocking plastic blocks hit the market in 1949, and they’ve been a hit with boys ever since. You can use them to build anything from a race car to a rape van, and in this modern age of technological sophistication, they’re one of the few toys that still rely on your imagination for the fun.

Over the years Lego has made a number of attempts to appeal to girls, but none have been very successful. In a bid to change that they recently released “Lego Friends,” which featured Lego girls with more realistic features, hair and little Lego boobs. They also have a brighter pastel color scheme.

Predictably, some self-appointed feminist watchdog group, The SPARK Movement, has complained the dolls “sexualize women.” They’ve also complained that female characters are sold with things like a bakery, beauty salon and pool while male characters come with spaceships and construction sites.

Do we really even want women on our Lego spaceships? We sent two ladies up with the Shuttle Challenger, and it exploded in a huge fireball. Same thing with Shuttle Columbia. At least with the new bakery set, the worst thing these Lego women can do is burn my lunch.

This stupid group, the Spark Movement, wants Lego to stop marketing different toys to boys and girls and only market in a gender-neutral way. They think gender is an artificial construct created by society, and that’s just ridiculous. I have a hunch there aren’t a lot of parents in this little group because once you have at least one boy and girl, you realize these little monsters come pre-programmed in two very different but equally annoying ways.

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