grifterKaren Anderson is a fraud who pretends to be a psychic and charges lonely people for fake messages from their pets. These pets can be living or dead, and prices start at $75 for a 15-minute session and go all the way up to $175 for a 45-minute session.

Here’s her website, and I can’t wait to email her a picture of every dump my dog takes for the next month, but she probably already knew that.

In order to drum up business for her con, Karen posted a message on her Facebook page claiming she spoke to Cecil psychically, and he had an inspiring message of hope. He told her “not to allow the actions of a few men to defeat us or allow darkness into our hearts.” He also said “to raise your vibration and allow this energy to move us forward.”

But the best part by far was this quote: “Be strong and speak for all the others who suffer needlessly to satisfy human greed.”

Is that anything like the greed of preying on lonely people and using deception to take their money, you filthy, duplicitous cunt?

And how exactly do animals speak to you, Karen? It’s somewhat odd that Cecil speaks the King’s English considering he was both born in Africa and is a goddamned lion.

If you’re a moron, and you still have a shred of doubt here, allow me to remove it. Even if lions could talk, and they can’t, the king of the goddamned jungle wouldn’t mumble about vibrations, energy and other hippy bullshit.

He would let all of you know that he is now a ghost lion, and he is going to feast on your nightmares and hunt your dream-self for sport until you either die of terror or piss yourself awake.