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I dislike Republicans, but I absolutely despise Democrats, and both parties have waged a presidential campaign based on lies, half-truths and deliberate deceptions. However, there was a welcome bit of honesty Sunday when Democratic protestors dressed as giant vaginas as they picketed the Republican National Convention in Florida.

I’ve long suspected that all liberals are really just huge female sexual organs, and this protest confirmed those suspicions.

Never mind, I take all that back. They weren’t admitting they’re huge pussies at all. It appears members of the group Code Pink took a break from telling mothers of dead soldiers that their sons deserved to die by playing a little game of dress-up to campaign for women’s rights.

I’m sure these women prattled on endlessly about abortion and equal rights while everyone around them politely nodded and snuck glances at their watch. But, they don’t even realize how great they have it.

The one and only time I wore my seven-foot penis costume in public, I got hit with a misdemeanor. I thought for a second about mouthing off to the cop, but I realized I didn’t really want to get arrested and thrown in jail dressed as a dick. Nothing good could have come from that.