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Back in the 1970s Alice Berkner, the hippie who founded the International Bird Rescue Research Center, decided to test which soap best cleaned birds affected by oil spills. According to her research Dawn won hands down.

She then petitioned Dawn’s parent company, Procter & Gamble, to donate cases of the soap to her organization, but at the time, no one really gave a shit about helping oil-covered birds and the company turned her down.

After a decade of badgering, they finally relented which was lucky for them. When the Exxon Valdez spill happened a year later, Dawn was used to clean the birds, and the free press that resulted was a Madison Avenue wet-dream.

I stumbled across an article about that happy coincidence earlier this year, and I started wondering, would Dawn work on me? I’m at least as disgusting as an oil covered bird, and I hate the idea of having 50 different soaps and shampoos in my house.

Instead of having one for my hands, one for my face, one for my hair and one for my body, could I find one miracle cleanser that replaces them all?

After a little bit of research, I can say without hesitation the answer is yes, and Dawn is that product.

As usual my wife refused to get on board with this decision, but a few weeks ago I decided to use Dawn exclusively for my personal hygiene needs. I refilled the hand-soap dispensers and replaced my trusty bottle of shampoo with Dawn, and the results have been outstanding.

My hair not only has a bright, shiny luster, but I can honestly say I’ve never felt so thoroughly degreased. If I can get over the taste, I may even start using it as a toothpaste.

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