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ripper According to a recent study in the journal Science, fish that were exposed to the anti-depressant benzodiazepine in their streams had less inhibition than normal fish, fed more readily and were also easier to catch than non-drugged fish.

The study doesn’t speculate what this means for humans, but it’s a safe bet that if you meet a woman on this medication, she also feeds more readily than her peers, has less inhibition and if your standards are nice and low, she’s probably easier to catch.

Jokes aside, it irks me that all of the drugs we pump into people to give them a semblance of normalcy go right through their bodies, through the water treatment plants and back into my food chain.

Like any healthy, normal man, I treat my psychological issues with a little drug called booze, and I don’t need some goddamned psychiatric poison entering the mix and upsetting my careful balance of insecurity and liquid courage.

And benzodiazepine is actually the least of your worries.

When I was looking for a daycare for my kids, I had two requirements. I didn’t want any men working there because there is something seriously wrong with any man who willingly spends time with children, and he must only be in it to corn-hole them.

Second, I wanted a place that only used well water so my kids’ developing brains wouldn’t be exposed to fluoride. Study after study has shown that fluoride damages IQ and brain development, and I think our sky-high rates of mental illness are directly related to this industrial waste being added to our water supply.